Dealing with Change & Stress
A baby, new husband, new job, new move, new friends is hard. I am going through changes now, and as you get older, it gets a little harder. I have redone my website, switched PR firms, learned how to post my own blogs, set up my own speaking engagements and now I am learning how to present myself in front of the media. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed, sometimes I feel great joy and sometimes I am fearful. The last emotion is the most dangerous. You freeze, you think don’t think logically, you can’t move forward and you certainly don’t get anything done.
Fear is a normal, biological response that is deep within our “reptile” brain. I will call it the old brain. What else goes on in there? Well, I call it the area of the four F’s….Food, Fight, Fear….and Fornication. I don’t address the last item, you will have to go another blog to get that information! So lets look at the other three. You see, we do have a new brain, the cortex, which uses logical thinking, reasoning skills, judgement, language…etc and that is suppose to overule the “old brain.” Well, that is if we let it do that. Throw in some stress, hormones and lack of time and money and we sometimes can’t find that area of the brain. So, lets talk about each one and see how we can make it better.
Food: We know we should eat in smaller portions, eat healthier food and listen to our body. Do we?
Fight: We do this very well. Look at our relationships, the country policies and the simple thing of who’s turn is it to take out the garbage? We know we are capapble of better social interaction, we can reduce the ego’s dominance and compromise, we can show empathy and compasion. Do we?
Fear: We all have to beat down this little evil intruder. We can make lists of our stengths, find support through professionals or reading material, breathe deep and reduce the stress through relaxation excercises. Do we?
The reason I am bringing this up….is…as a young mother that is sleep deprived, overwhelmed with what to do next, hormonally up and down and presented with the responsibility of another human being for the rest of her life can send one over the edge. So…remember….ARE YOU IN THE OLD BRAIN…or…DO YOU NEED TO USE THE NEW BRAIN!
How can you do that?
- Learn relaxation excercises through breath control
- Go for a walk with the baby in the stroller, get some form of excercise
- Take a hot shower or bath
- Play and sing along with your favorite music
- Dance in the living room with your baby as your partner
- Laugh…reading funny jokes, stories
- Call a family member, friend or neighbor
- Set up a support system of friends, family, neighborhood kids or church preschool (mother’s morning out)
And know….that you need to use your brain to get through those days that leave you exhausted and overwhelmed so that you can make plans to make it a better day tomorrow.
I appologize for the delay in getting my blog up and running…but I am in my New Brain now.
Have a great day
Kathryn Thorson Gruhn
Author of My Baby Compass, A child develoment program that will make parenting easier